Reminder:

The writing on this blog is from teens who are in a lockdown facility called O&A. O&A stands for Observation and Assessment, a 45-day period ordered by the courts where their behaviors, attitudes, and skills are charted for their juvenile judge.

Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Class Poetry: "Take a Look and Tell Me"

Take a Look and Tell me
What you See in Me
This is what I see

I see the one
the one to make it
And not to take it
the one to quit
Quit doin wrong
I can not be locked up any longer
then I wonder
when i will go under
6 feet under
then i feal
feal a feeling
the rush
the only way to cope
with this odd world.

A.M., age 14

Monday, May 30, 2011

Everyone Has a Story: "Life"

It all began 1993 when for the first time my wonderful parents would see me.  I assumed that they would love me because for 9 straight months my mother took care of me, fed me and always carried me. I grew up in a descent home with a descent family, grew up fast. My family somewhat poor even came to the point where I asked for toys knocking from door to door. I have no idea why such at a young age my father decided to leave not even looking at his son's face. to much drama maybe could handle a baby mamma but why didn't he think of that before saying oops my bad. Maybe it wasn't always him making bad decisions. Maybe because of his parents pressuring him to leave his wife who cares about the child. Wow, this situation grow oh so wild.

They called themselves Religious. At one point even Christians but why would you hire a witch to cross a kids veins to me that makes 0% sense. Thank god my mother said no or else I would have been gone with absolutely no hope. No one would of brought him back not even a priest not even the Pope. I guess without him for the Mother and Son they would starve and wouldn't have water to drink. At least that's what he would always think. I guess since Birth Death has been wanting to take me away. I remember a day when I was eating candy and felt it go down my throat got stuck there wouldn't go down any more tried to ask for help because I was being chocked. I was outside in the dark with no one around, ran back home pounding on the door with no one to help me feeling scared and alone. Finally my grandma came out with a shout happy to see me although lived down the road. She saw my anxiety figured me out gave me a piece of bannana finally swallowed it down. Don't know how it worked but I thank god for her helping me out.

Years later my father saw my mother he asks have you found another. What kind of question is that when you left your son back didn't have the balls to support and even give up change to get your own son's diapers changed. She said screw you, forget about it I know I can do it on my own. We'll make it through life. Little did she knows there were days she had to sacrafice her own food in order for her young one to survive.

There came good times and bad like when I saw my mother trying to hide because of all the tears coming out of her eyes I told her don't worry don't cry I love you I love you don't worry it will all be okay. I was so young little did I know we barely had money to make a payment for the place we used to stay. To me time was nothing but fun and play but to my mother it was where will we go next? Time passed by my mother grew strong found a good job even getting to be by her son. School was fun. Mornings were rough I grew older We moved to a new place I got used to growing up on my own but never alone. Thanks god for the mother you blessed me with. I love her to death would never replace her.

I don't care what anyone says but to me she is the best. She took care of me since day one never knew what I'd look like but she knew she loved me when I was in her stomach. She would talk to me as if she knew I was listening she did it alone without the help of what is supposed to be a man, the love of her life. But better off alone than being accompanied by the wrong person or who is not worth being with. I know everything happens for a reason and I thank god till this day because after all the struggles He has us together being successful riding in nice cars living in a nice home even got a new person joining the family.

My little sister because after all my mother met that special someone or her true love. She deserves to be happy after all these years she learned the ways of god and she says she sees me in a stadium preaching the gospel to millions one day and if its gods choice to put me up there hopefully I can make my mothers and my dream come true.

Look at me how I am 17, got a job, I am a young adult doing it on my own. Thanks to go he has us healthy. I know I've made mistakes, but I also have learned that learning from our mistakes is what is important and improve not just taking everything for granted and not caring or changing. Thanks to god for my family, peers, and staff.

L. G., age 17

Friday, May 27, 2011

One Thing I'm Going to Do Differently...

-"When I leave O&A Im going to go to school, dont sluff, and stay in school until I graduate." I.F., age 15

-"I'm Going To Make Better Decisions When I Get Out." R.Y., age 15

-"One thing that I will do diffrently when I leave O&A is Im not going to take my mom's car out for a joy ride during church, but come home be honest about it. I aint going to lie to my parents no more." L.J., age 15

-"When I get out I will Be nicer to my younger/older sisters." D.B., age 14

-"One thing I'm going to do diffrently is think before I act." C.H.

-"Stay off Drug's." J.B., age 14

-"When I get out I got to change my ways and stop my drug & alcohol use. I'm going to change my thinking ways." W.M.

-"One thing I will do differently when I leave O&A is treat my family with respect and go to school." B.C., age 16

-"Im going to go back to school and stop doing drugs." J.J., age 17

-"One thing Ima do different is go to church and stay drug free." C.S.

-"When I get out of this Places I'm going to be good." J.Z., age 14

-"Something ill do different is, stay out of trouble get my job back, become a prosnowboarder get ready for collage and do my work in everything i do.. I have learned what to say no to and how to approache it I no I can do it and will do it. thank you Sarah!!! Peace." A.P.

-"What Im going to do when I leave is get a job and graduate high school & college and not go back with my old friends That's how Im going to change." K.G., age 17

-"When I leave O&A I'm going to listen to my mom. Go to school. And complete probation. Also I'm going to try to graduate from high school. Keep my head up & stay positive." A.P.

-"I am gonna change my ways and follow what my dad says." M.B., age 15

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Song: Say Understand

Say thenes a way that I was lost in broken skys
threw my all seeing eyes I knew it all,
and all I have to say is you--
is that you took my heart right through all the pain,
when rain would fall,
Ide hoped to catch them all, but from the start
you were my soal you take my hand say understand
you always knew said I got you say understand
but when my changes made a way, the sun set
brighter days, I wouldn't rest, till I found the best
no running away. Im here to stay

R.M.

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Haikus by Mr. Spense

slow motion runner
thin red cheek molasses queen
will your knees survive 

Six boys on one car
Like maggots on a dead cat
Buffing steel and chrome 

Poem: I am Art

I am art
I wonder about designs
I hear my creations
I see paintings
I want an art studio
I am art

I pretend to be my pictures
I feel like a star
I do my own work
I worry about what's to come
I cry beautiful images
I am art

I understand what others don't
I say I am the best artist
I wish dreams
I try my best to be an artist
I hope this all comes true
I am art

L.B., age 15

Monday, May 23, 2011

Poem: Haiku

I look at my bowl
I pour cereal in it
I eat some breakfast

L.B., age 15

Friday, May 20, 2011

One Thing I'm Going to Do Differently...

-"One thing im going to do different is im going to Think Long Term and not short term." T.H., age 17

-"Not smoke any more. And not come back to farmington bay." B.H.

-"Not get in trouble Be respectful to my mother treat others the way I wanted to be treated." R.G., age 16

-"Say NO to Drugs and go back to school and help my mom." T.H., age 15

-"I will stay away from Gangs and focus my time on positive activities." T.C., age 16

-"One thing I will do when I am outta Here at this popsicle Joint, I will not have Bad Friends who help me Choose wrong decisions, and think right." N.J.

-"Become closer to my parents & family. Talk to them about what troubles me in life." J.H.

-"One thing that I will change when I leave O&A is change my friends & apply myself in school." J.G., age 15

-"When I leave O&A I want to be ablet o control my anger and be a positive roll model for my son and stay out of trouble not just for myself But for my son and wife." S.M., age 17

-"When I leave O&A I will make Better choices and I'm going to get a job and help with my little brothers." A.G., age 17

-"I will stay sober!" R.M., age 17

-"I want to do my best and finish school and followe my mom rules and probation and do my best I can do It" P.M., age 16

-"Im gonna stay a way from the green herb." H.B., age 13

-"One thing I'll do diffrent when I get out Ima Think for Myself and help my Mom out and stay out, but Ima still sag [my pants]." P.C., age 14

-"I will go back to school; get out of trouble and stay out." S.G., age 17

-"When I Leave O&A I'm Going to NOT Get ANY More Charges!!!" G.U.

Thursday, May 19, 2011

Poem: Rain

Tip Tap tip tap
Rain is beautiful
Rain is life
it makes air fresh and pure
it cleans the earth
purifys it so we can all live in it

I love rain
How it soaks my hair
The way it drip down my face
How it feels so soft on my skin
Rain is like drops of heaven

Rain is free
Amazing
Brings life to our planet
What would we do without rain?

Rain, rain, please don't go away.

M.D., age 14

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Poem: Ryming Poem

Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Iv never smelt someone, as stinky as you, so go take a shower, and make it an hour, scrub with lots of power, so you smell like a flower, then at the end, we will all pretend, that you never smelt so bad and be your friend, and thats the end, until you stink again.

J.G.

Saturday, May 14, 2011

Everyone Has a Story: "My Story"

My name is A. I was born in Utah, i've lived in _(city)_ most my life. I had a good childhood like normal kids, played outside, played games, and colored pictures. That was till I turned 7, my uncle died, my dads brother. So they had the body driven to Utah because thats where his mom and family lived and then my mom out of the kindness of her  heart took the widow and her 2 kids in after the funarul. A couple months had past and my mom and dad started arguing more often. then one day my dad did not come home from work. Later we got a call from him he said he was in _(state)_ with his brother's wife. Then he came back to get his stuff and i remember riding in the U-haul and my parents were fighting, then when we got to our house, the last thing for a while my dad said "I will be back."

After that we were not making enough money to pay the rent so we moved to _(state)_ and we lived with my moms parents. Then my older brother assaulted my little sister. So me and my brother and sister and mom moved to the middle of nowhere till we moved back to Utah. They weren't the greatest of times eather. We were eating and stuff and had clean clothes, but thats not where it ends. I know most people wish this were a happy ending but not in this story.

A little later it all started for me. I started stealing from gas stations then I got caught. I was not charged or anything. He just gave me a talk and gave me a ride to school then I stoped for a while and in 2nd grade we had people that take the lunch money, I took $10 then at recess I kept beting people and i guess i bet the wrong people. The teacher found out and i got my parents called and i got into trouble, not with the law just with my mom. Then I really just stopped. Life was going back to normal. I was playing outside again and becoming a kid again and then i came home one friday from school. And when i opened the door my mom was yelling at my older brother. Then i may have heard the worst words I could ever hear, it happened again. He assaulted my 4 year old sister. He wasn't let off easy this time. He was in state custody for 4 years.

I guess i stopped stealing for that period of time. A few years past and he was let out at 16. He got out and the state gave him a scholarship and he is going to school and that's when i started stealing again. now i'm 11. i was stealing from my mom and stores. Soon the stealing stopped when we moved.......Then gradually I reached 7th grade, i was still constantly stealing stuff that i wanted. it soon become the feeling of success and just the fealing of I did something and it payed off.

So back to my life, the stealing was pilling up candy rappers everywhere and no explanation of where they came from. Soon on my birthday my mom she found all the stuff. She sent me to bed and I didn't get cake or anything. so i went on and kep stealing then i go caught stealing at school then i came to detention for 2 days. Then I did 30 days on house arrest then i got off and was doing good. Then i got caught stealing at school again, then I had to do 60 days of house arrest then I got caught again. And again.

Friday, May 13, 2011

Poem: You were My Brother

You were my brother, my very best homie, you were always down for mine
Showing much respect to me.

We were so close I loved having you here, if it was up to me you would still
Be here.

You didn't deserve that shot, you were a soldier, for your life you fought.

I stood there next to you not leaving your side, you tried to stay calm but the
Pain on your face you couldn't hide.

As I looked around the room I saw faces full of tears, my nightmare was coming
True loosing you through a bullet was my greatest fears.

When you left I felt so alone, I didn't know what to do. I begged god to bring you back,
or to take me with you.

You left us down here with our hearts full of pain; I should have tried harder to get you
On the right lane.

As I watched you lay in silence, I saw my last tears drop. What happened to that boy who
said he'd make it to the top?

I now realize you haven't left you're always here with me, and all this guilt and anger is
something you would want me to set free.

No matter what I'll miss you, you'll always be my best friend, and your love and
kindness is something I'll hold inside of me until I reach the end.

E.C., age 15

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Poem: I Cry and Die Inside

i cry and die inside. i am broken. slowly puting myself back together. all i can think of is when i was looking up from the ground when you knocked me down. puttin my arms out trying to catch my homie be4 he hitz ground. as blood splatz i try to shead no tearz but for i no your fate. your love is true an i love you. i do. now i pray to you. i do because i love you and i will stay true.

R.I.P.

D.W., age 14

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Everyone Has a Story: "O.D."

3 am. December 18th. I never thought I would have to see not just one but four of my friends all O.D. (overdose) at once. I can't tell you there names but the inatles of there names or nicknames. That morning before was like any other. We met up and smoked some weed the usual six "B"s, some kid I didn't know, and I. At first I was going to be harmless just some weed but that was not enough for the rest of the guys. They wanted some cheese (street name for heroin). I told them I would help them find some but would not touch the stuff. None of us had any money so we split up and did what we usually did to get money. We would panhandle at the local stores. Asking strangers for money. The funny thing was they would give us the money. So when we had the money we would get in T's car and we drove to _(city)_ to get it. We pulled up to a house that look nice but when we walked in guns drugs and naked girls were every where. I was scared. I think the others were too but didn't want to admit it.

We did the exchange and got the drugs and we left as soon as possible. We got back to C's house and by the time we got back it was midnight. Since I was not going to have any cheese they have me the rest of the weed. After they [got it ready], I watched one by one them stick the needle into their vains and eject the liquid. For the first ten minutes, they were fine but one by one almost in the same order they took the drug they went into a seizure. As high as I was I knew what was going on so I ran down the street to get my friend. We carried each one of my ODing friends and threw them into C's car. I started the car and drove to the local hospital. With my jacket and ball cap covering my face, I took four wheelchairs and my friend help me put them in the wheel chairs. I pushed two of them in and the other two my friend pushed right into the emergency room. The secretary ask what was wrong but me and my friend ran back to the car and put it in drive and we were gone.

B. lived and got put on probation. T died but was brought back to life and is now homeschooled. C is now in rehab; he is there for 4 years. And for J he has been clean since then. This is one of the many reasons I don't touch any thing with a needle.

Poem: What do I see?

WHAT DO I SEE

I SEE A BOY CRYING FOR HELP,
THAT BEEN IN THE DARKNESS TO LONG,
THAT LOOKING FOR LIGHT

WHAT DO I SEE

I SEE A BOY LOOK FOR LOVE
BUT CAN'T FIND BECAUSE
BECAUSE?
THERE ARE TO MUCH HATRED AND PREJUDICE IN THE WORLD,

WHAT DO I SEE,

I SEE A BOY TRYING TO DO GOOD,
BUT HE TRAP IN A WALL OF BAD

NOW,


WHAT DO I SEE

I SEE A BOY THAT BECAME SUCCESSFUL,

YEAH YEAH SUCCESSFUL,

THAT BOY HAS THE WORLD IN HIS HAND,


NOW,

WHAT I SEE

I SEE A BOY THAT BECAME A MAN

B.M.

Monday, May 9, 2011

Poem: I am Lonely

I am lonely
I wonder why she did this to me
I heard her words
I saw she was lying to me
I want everything to be okay
I am lonely
I pretend I don't care
I feel betrayed
I do wish I could forgive her
I worry I will never be able to
I cry because the pain is unbearable
I am lonely
I understand she is sorry
I say it is not okay
I wish things could be the way they were
I hope some day I can forgive and forget
I am lonely

Sunday, May 8, 2011

Poem: I am a Miracle

I am a miracle.
I wonder who to save.
I hear your prayers.
I see your heartache.
I want to help.
I am a miracle.

I pretend to be happy.
I feel put down.
I do not distress.
I worry no one cares.
I cry at your loss.
I am a miracle.

I understand how you feel.
I say what is needed.
I wish you believe in me.
I try to save you.
I hope you know.
I am a miracle.

T.H., age 17

Saturday, May 7, 2011

Poem: "I"

He broken your heart,
He smashed it,
He ripped it,
But,
But I,
I repair it,
Like,
Like a broken house,
I fix it,
I made it into something,
Something BIG
BIGGER than my dream,

He lies to you,
He cheat it,
He left you,
I,
I comforted you,
I protected you,
He lost you,
Like,
Like time on a clock,
But,
But I found you,
Like a lost puppy,
He destroyed you,
Like hope and dream,
I build you,
Like a steal wall,
No,
More than a steal wall,
Like an independent wall,

He see's you as a trash,
I see's you as a Queen,

B.M.

Friday, May 6, 2011

Poem: O&A

While here in O&A, we should try to do our best
It's not a walk in the park
We are in here for a test.
I mean, come on, if any of us here are wishing to succeed,
Then each and every one of us better be willing to believe.
When our time in here is done,
 on the outs, we gotta give it our all.
We gotta go out there and shoot for the stars and try not to fall.
Don't let your haters bring you down
 they can't diss your shine.
All you gotta do is turn around, walk away, and say it doesn't hurt.
Keep trying.

J.H.

Thursday, May 5, 2011

Fiction Writing Prompt: "3 Keys"


"You were just given three keys. 
They will open anything you want. 
Use your imagination! 
What do they open?" 


"1# Key to all of the doors in this place [O&A]. 2# Key to a Skyline car. 3# Key to the biggest manchine [mansion] in the world."

"1-Basement; 2- House; 3- Car."

"1. Freedom. 2. Better Life. 3. House."

"1. Mortuary. 2. Army Tank. 3. Gen X store."

"1. My escape from here. 2. Key to the city. 3. Plane to Las Vegas, Nevada."

"One of these key's go to the New York Giant's locker room as starting QB! One of these key's go to the bigest manchin [mansion] in the world and one go's to a 2010 Camaro."

"1. All the doors to Farmington Bay. 2. My dream house. 3. Key to my brand new black and yellow lambo Mercialargo with suicide doors and tinted windows and 20" rims."

"Key 1 goes to a ferreri enzo. Key 2 is to a mansion. Key 3 is to knowing everything."

"Success. Key to my 2011 Chrysler. Room full of money."

"64 Chevy Impala with the top down. Family. Secoryaty key."

"Car Cobra. Skelten Key. Heart."

"Key to being President's personal assistant or a key that opens everything. Key to Audi R8 SPYDER Coupe with black chrome and 18" rims. Key to a magic geni lamp that will give me unlimited wishes."

"Freedom. Happines. Reunite."

"1. Freedom. 2. Education/School. 3. Play for REAL Salt Lake."

"1. The key to be free in any way, shape, or form. 2. The key to the universe. 3. The key to fort Knox."

"1.One key is a key to my freedom and I won't be free unless I use it properly. 2. One key is a key to my success. The lock it goes to is not easy to open but if I work hard to open it I can open it. 3. One key is the key to all the knowledge in the world. This lock is also hard to open but with enough work I can get it."

Everyone Has a Story: "Have you Seen Me?"

I was sitting at home and the police kicked in my door and I said "Mom, don't let them take me." Then before I could run to my mom the police had a hold on me and and he said "Do you think you're so tough?" So I said "Screw you, I'll throw you on the ground and beat you with your night stick." Then he threw me in the back of the car and I said "Where are you taking me?" and he said "I'm taking you to the big house with the big boys and the big guys." Then he started laughing so I spit in his face and said "Screw the police."

Then we started to drive away and I saw my mom on her knees on the front lawn and she was crieing and I started crieing too so I asked "Can I go say bye to my mom?" So he said "No, you were caught with weed now you are being arrested." So I said "Please, I cann't be taken from my mom without saying bye." But he kept driving and we turned a corner and my mom was cut of sight so I started crieing even more and I said "How can you take me from my mom and not let me say bye to her?" and he said "Because it my job to arrest people and take them to lock up facilities like the one you're going to called _____________." So I said "So why can't I just say bye to her?" and he said "Just shut up and wait till we get to the YOUTH CENTER then you can call her from there and say what you want to say to her." So I said "But I want to tell her in person" and he said "You can't because I have orders to take you here." And I said "Who cares if you brake one order?" Then we pulled in front of the _______ Youth Center and he took me inside and the people at the front desk said "You're back again?" Then a week later I went to court and got a 30 day pryer release to O&A. When I went to court my Judge said "You're going to Farmington Bay O&A for 45 days." This is my life experience.

L., age 13

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Poem: The Bullet

I have a cold blooded heart
And that's just the start
I destroy lives
I destroy nations
There's nowhere to hide

I kill for fun
I will make you die in the sun
The danger I am
is slow moving but burning pain
if you use me
you will go insain

Yes I am loud
But I create much sorrow
even more maby tomorrow

I am a loud dark shadow
in every city, and every town
I'm easily hidden I'm easily found

I fly fast and straight
But I have little weight
I destroy every thing in my path
I might even kill you with a
ratatatat.

I can end up in your arm
I can end up in your leg
But whatever you do, you might end up dead.
There's many ways to use me
But I kill as many people as you can see

When your loaded in the clip
You better not even trip
Cause when I read the chamber
You may already know
there's instant danger.

I'm a dangerous addiction
I can even make you have a
Artificial resperation
to much tim I wait
when I wish I had some thing to relaite

Sometimes I'm fat
Sometimes I'm skinny
But what every you do
I always put you in the gurny

I can shoot through the wall
I can shoot in the sky
But I can assure you I'm telling no lie

I know I'm evil I know I am bad
But I'm sorry if I make you sad
The way you see me
is not from a bat
but from a barrell of a gun

That's how I am
That's how I'll be
for ever and ever
so now you see.

R.C., age 17.

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Poem: I am in Love

I am in love
I wonder what she is doing
I hear her say I love you
I see her beautiful smile
I want to be home with her
I am in love

I pretend I'm somewhere else
I feel so amazing with her by my side
I do everything for her
I worry if she is ok
I cry when she cries
I am in love

I understand her feelings
I say I love you
I wish she was with me
I try to make her happy
I hope we last
I am in love

R.P., age 17